The Details

Hello dear friends. :) This post as been in the making for a long time, longer than I think I realize. And it is a bit lengthy. Today, I want to write about one of the biggest lessons I've been learning so far on this 6 month journey, the details. In the last month especially, I have seen God's hand in the details of my life. They can be simple like learning to drive in the snow which has allowed me to drive in Latvia's crazy snowy weather without problems. Or they can be much bigger, like before I was even born God was already working out the details. While I was watching some of these details play out, I also happened to be having a Harry Potter marathon and this helped deepen my thoughts. Whether you like Harry Potter or not, that's for a different time, just stay with me. There were 7 books written in this series and from the first book to the last, there were so many details to work out. We see things that happened in the first book, come back around in the last book. For someone to have a mind like that, to create such a series like Harry Potter, they have to have an incredible thought process. 7 books worth of details, orchestrating things to happen one way to make the next thing happen. My mind was blown. Then I thought about my own life. I have a God whose mind is even greater than J. K. Rowling's mind. I looked at 2 obvious examples that I will explore more, but I also looked deeper, going backwards in my life and I was awe struck. Had I not gone with Awe Star that summer to Latvia, (which I did contemplate for a little bit), I wouldn't be here now. Had I not gone to church with Jo at South Community Church to watch her play guitar on the worship band, I wouldn't be a part of the amazing body of believers and best church family I could have. Had I not moved in with Katie, Lauren, and Liz I don't think I would have been so connected to Awe Star. Had the relationship with Liz not been formed at Parkview, I wouldn't have moved in with Katie, Lauren, and Liz. Had I not moved to Oklahoma, I of course wouldn't know any of the amazing people that I know now nor do I think I would be in Latvia. Had I not met my dad, then I wouldn't know my cousin Liz who had a huge part in me moving to Oklahoma in the first place. Had I not gone to school at Marian College, I wouldn't have my best friend, Julie, nor would I have the memories that have helped shaped me into who I am. Had I not been so ready to leave West Salem, I don't think I would have gone to Marian. Had God not moved my family from South Beaver Creek Church to Our Saviors when I was in middle school, I don't think I would have ever went on a mission trip (those trips in High School helped push me to search more about God). There are so many details like that, when I look back, I am just blown away. But I took it one step further still and this is what really blew my mind. Had my mom not gone to Our Saviors before I was born, we would have never have gone there because the reason we chose to go there, was because my mom already knew she liked the church and the church body. Even before I was born, God was working out the plan for my life. Incredible right?! Well, now I want to tell you two stories that have happened recently to help me realize this. The first one was with a girl I met at a birthday party and then we met again 3 weeks later at a conference. While at the Fathers Heart Conference, I felt God was wanting me to share my testimony with everyone during an open share time but in my flesh I said, "no God, I don't want to share something so personal with all these strangers". But the burning in my heart only got stronger and I've learned that means God wants to share His story so I must obey. So I shared the part about finding who I was through Walker’s "Orphan Heart" teaching and through my relationship with Brent as my Spiritual Father. After the conference was done for the day, a girl came up to me and told me how much the story spoke to her and encouraged her and the words I said about how I felt unworthy, dirty, useless, unloved was exactly how she was feeling. The next day we had time to split into groups of 2 and be honest and real with each other. She asked if she could be with me and proceeded to shared her story with me which was pretty similar to mine. The words she told me reminded me of myself and my views just 3-4 years ago. Through some amazing time with the Holy Spirit and being in prayer, God spoke into her heart and lifted a huge weight off her shoulders! It was truly an amazing experience to see God work like that especially when you know the feeling! God is so great! He gets all the glory for everything He's done in my life and even if this girl is the only reason I am here, it will all be worth it! The crazy thing is, we met just 3 weeks prior and I think had we not known each other, this wouldn't have played out this way. Only God knows the details and it is fun to watch them play out. :) The second story is about my dear friend Lana. In my eyes, my friendship with Lana was an "accident". What I mean by that is, I didn't plan us to get so close but I am realizing it was all a part of God's plan. Lana is a part of God's plan for my life. (yes I know that sounds cheesy but whatever :) ) When I came in March for an "affirmation" trip, I had to spend the night with Lana which wasn't planned at all. In my self I was feeling, "I am not supposed to be here. Lana probably feels obligated to have me stay with her." All these thoughts were definitely from the enemy. I remember reading a card that night from a small group at my church that said "even if you don't feel like it, you are exactly where God wants you, right in this moment". Only now did this make sense. God knows the details. He has only grown our friendship even more. About 2 weeks about, Lana called me up and said that she wanted me to come visit her at her school, there were teachers from America coming so it would be good for me and she wanted to spend time with me. So I went, even though it was the week of our Connected Camp, and had one of the most relaxing checked out times thus far in Latvia. God's presence overwhelmed me and spoke very softly to me that week. He reminded me I needed to be Jesus focused again not ministry focused. He also spoke to me about my friendship with Lana. Since I am here without a "team" there are days I get lonely and just really want a friend to laugh with, process things with, be silly with, go deep with, and just be with. It was like God hit me over the head with a brick saying, "Don't you see who's in front of you? Why do you keep looking for something I have already given you?" I believe God knows the details way better than we do. God knew I would need a friend. God knew Lana would help fill a need in my life. God knew Lana would bring laughter, "exhale" time, and peace to my life. He knew we would love each other and serve each other because ultimately we are sisters in Christ and He is what brought us together. When I realized all these things, I was very humbled. God cares about me so much that He takes care of the details. He chose me to come into the world at this certain time. He chose me to come to Latvia. He has given me a purpose, that only He can fulfill through my life. He has taken care of all the details, even those that never cross my mind. And He does the same for you!!! I am thankful God knows the end and works out the details. I am thankful that God cares for me enough to know just the right people to place into my life, orchestrate the meetings, and grow the friendships. I am thankful for the lessons He teaches me and that He has given me a heart that loves to learn and loves to seek. :) Thank you Jesus for creating me perfect for the purpose you have for me. :) Even to a God who can breath the stars into being, the details of our lives matter to Him. :)