A long over-due update

Well hey beautiful blog world! This update could be a long one with different updates. As you may or may not know, the next month will be filled with many "see ya laters", many hugs, probably some tears, lots of reflections, and much joy! I am about to embark on the next step of this amazing journey! The end of August I will walk on to a plane and fly miles to my new temporary home. I will be living in Kuldiga, Latvia spending every day building relationships and spreading God's love. Words cannot describe how excited and expectant I am! I am very humbled that Jesus would use someone like me to do something so great! I'm thankful for His grace! These past few weeks I've done a lot of reflecting. 5 years ago, I closed the door on a haunting part of my past. My step-dad was charged for his abuse and the word was out. I no longer carried that heavy burden on my own and yet I was still extremely insecure. If you knew me then, you knew I was the most comfortable when I was wearing a hoodie (hood up) and didn't reveal much skin. 5 years ago, I also decide to move to Oklahoma. Only God knew what was to come but I knew I couldn't fight the opportunity to move. I said "goodbye" to many aspects of my life I didn't like (the partying) and said "see ya later" to people whom were dear to my heart. I made a choice to move to a place I didn't know anyone and didn't really know what my future would hold. 3 years ago, I came back from my first 35-day mission trip to Peru. During that summer I said "goodbye" to my own life. I made a promise to God from that day forward I would try my best to glorify Him every day. I was learning that meant I had to lay down my own desires, lay down the things that brought me instant gratification, lay down my plans and pick up His. I was learning that I needed to trust Him with my life for He had a better plan. I was learning to trust God as my Father and trust those people around me. I had to say "goodbye" to my insecurities and "hello" to a life exposed to God and other people. 2 years ago- I said "goodbye" to another layer of insecurity. I learned that to move forward with the life God had for me, I had to forgive my step-dad. I had to say "goodbye" to the hold he had on my life and truly let go and let God love. Layer after layer, God kept purifying my heart to draw me closer to Him. This happened while I was processing and having to say, "see ya later" to my best friend and roommate. She was leaving the country and I had come to the realization that she wasn't leaving me. I had to realize that even though people come and go, people may not always be in your daily life, but Jesus is. I had to learn even more what it meant to rely on Him first, last, and always! I could feel in my heart a big change was coming, but I didn't know what. 1 year ago- I said "see ya later" to one of the greatest blessings of friendship I have been graciously given. I spent 3 weeks with a friend, serving God, and becoming sisters. I fought it in my heart to open up, but God kept using her to gently remind me it's okay to let people see the very core of who I am. Because who my soul reflects, is Jesus. And the best way for people to see Jesus in my life, is to let them see the very core of who I am. I only recently came to this revelation, as I was reflecting back in last summer. It's a challenge still to this day to let people look into my eyes when I share my heart. But God used my friend to help me realize that when I look someone in the eye, and let them see my heart, hopefully they don't see me, they see Jesus. Also, I realized when I came home last summer, I needed to say "goodbye" to my original idea of teaching in a classroom. Things were messed up with my degree, but that's when God staring showing me the next big change in my life, moving to Latvia. I had to say "goodbye" to my flesh not wanting to leave my niece and nephews, and say "hello" to the legacy this will set for them. Now- I am packing my bags, cleaning out my closets, and saying "goodbye" to "The 15". I am saying "goodbye" to a place that has been my temporary home for the past 4 years. I'm saying "see ya later" to people who have become my family. To people who have impacted my life more than words can express. A church that truly reflects that church is more than a building. A community group who I can count on for laughter, edifying conversations, and prayer support at any moment. I'm saying "see ya later" to coworkers who have seen me grow as an employee and a person. To a group who has laughed with me in our hardest days and breathed a sigh of relief when they were over. A group that has challenged me to be a witness when the world says likewise. I'm saying "see ya later" to many things and people that God has used as vessels and tools to radically change my life and surrender to Him. So as you can imagine, this next month here in Oklahoma will be filled with many things. I am beyond blessed at the group of people who have supported me, challenged me, watched me grow, held my hand when needed, hugged me, laughed with me, cried with me, an ultimately believed in me! I cannot thank any one person enough so I will only continue to strive to pass it forward and change the world one heart at a time. I believe through Jesus this is possible! Thank you for reading. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for believing in me!